Friday, June 1, 2007

BUSTED!!

WOOOOHOOOOO, I THINK I SOLVED THE MYSTERY!!

I just came across this picture on IraqSlogger.com, and the comment goes like this:

BAGHDAD, IRAQ - MAY 24: An Iraqi boy climbs boards a boat to cross the Tigris River on May 24, 2007 in Baghdad, Iraq. A number of Iraqis have turned to use boats to cross the banks of the Tigris River after the bombing of at least four bridges in Baghdad.



Remember how we all after this series of bombing bridges and building walls, we all started throwing accusations of them being sectarian acts by some one with interest in separating Baghdad into Sunni and Shiite areas restricted for each other!! I remember I myself started making fun of how stupid I think it is, how obvious the way things are going.... And of course as Arabs we all invented the usual conspiracy theory involving Israel and the Mossad etc. etc., you know, the way we always do....

Now watching these pictures were like a shock to me, I suddenly realised that we were all wrong!!

The thing happening behind the scenes which I am about to revile now is going to be a surprise to all of you, so please hold on tight to your seats, sit down if you are reading while you are standing, prepare for the shock:


IT'S THE BOAT DRIVERS"or whatever you want to call them"!!

picture this with me, a group of those boat owners gather in a meeting to search their current situation.... The business is really bad these days, you know people are more worried about their asses than taking a trip in the Tigris, beside, they'd rather spend their money on buying fuel than taking a boat with their chicks!!

What is the solution?! what can we do?! we can't earn our living like this specially when we can't go fishing because you know how it is with 30 years of throwing deadly chemicals and wastes into the river, by now all the fish are probably looking like TMNT "teenage mutant ninja turtles" so fishing them is not an option!

P.S from the writer ..... I know it sounds dump, a fisherman knowing about TMNT but bare with me here, you got the point, that's the important thing!!


Now back to our fishermen, a long silent pause domains until a voice comes from among them..... I have an idea!!!

*What idea? tell us please!!
*It's kindda cranky, I am not sure if you would agree to it...
*just tell us anything, we are desperate here, can't you see?! We would go for anything, just talk!
*......... Blow up the bridges.
*huh?!
*You heard me, lets blow up the bridges, people won't find a way to cross the river and they will have to come back to us!! We would be the only way for them to get to their jobs and houses...
Everyone will be crawling to get in the line for a ride!!
*mmmm.....!
*C'mon, think about it. It's a really good idea, no one will ever suspect the poor guys who spent their lives sailing in the river!!
*..........
*..........
*..........
*..........
*It sounds like a good idea to me!
*yeah, me too!
*But guys....
* Oh shut up, no buts, we need to feed the family " said in a dangerous mob way", and I will do anything to prove my loyalty to the family.
*...........
*So are you with us or not?!
*........... I am sorry, but this is against my morals, I can't help but think of all the people who would get killed in such a massacre!
*Okay soft boy, I am afraid we can't leave any witnesses behind.... KILL HIM!!!

"sound of a fight and someone getting slayed eventually"



I will leave the rest for your imagination, I think you know how it must have gone, just some explosives, easy to attach them to the bases of the bridges using their boats, no one will suspect why they were roaming around the area, after all, it's their job!!

Now, I bet if you get some of those CSI people with their weird devices, they will find traces of saliva, sorry chemical stuff used for making home made explosives on their hands, urine and hair maybe even disect one of them and search for it in his lungs!!

you can find some more pictures that support my accusations here!
Notice the devilish looks in their eyes, you know what they say, once a murderer, forever a murderer.

I guess they underestimated how genius I am or just never thought I'd see those pictures!!








P.S I was simply joking above but I am happy that at least one party got benefit from these massacres!

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